Being Trans: My journey to raising the Trans Pride Flag at 55 Broadway

When I joined London Underground (LU) in 1988 I knew I was Trans. This for me meant I struggled every day with my personal identity. For years I thought I was the only person who felt this way. 
I’d considered I might be gay, or bisexual, but while that fitted some of the facts, it clearly wasn’t the whole story. I didn’t particularly like doing things that girls were supposed to do – I was really a tomboy – but I wanted to be a girl, often felt myself to be a girl, dreamt about becoming a girl, physically. 
These feelings got stronger and as I grew older I realised just how unacceptable they were. So by the time I joined LU I’d learned to keep it all inside me. I still had the feelings but I managed to suppress them 
I started in signals and was often out on nights in an all male environment working on equipment in dark and dirty places. Sexist jokes abounded as did the occasional joke about ‘trannies’. Guys would be ‘teased’ about being a secret crossdresser. All the time I was thinking if they knew about me, I’d be ripped apart. 
In the next 10 years I went from walking through tunnels to sitting in an office and reporting on performance. The mostly male environment and the dodgy jokes, unfortunately, remained a regular feature. 
I always thought I’d keep my secret to the grave. What I never foresaw was what has happened in the last four years. In 2013, I came out at work and then later that year I transitioned to being a woman. In particular, I never imagined in a million years I would be sitting with Mark Wild, the Managing Director of LU and talking to him about what it is like to be Trans. I probably thought that more likely that I’d eventually bullied out of work or sacked. 
Mark told me that he believed an organization that embraces diversity is a more efficient company, that when people are able to be themselves they work better, and being inclusive
means you get wider choice of people with the right skills.  
Mark asked for one thing he could do for Trans people. To me all the things that have to happen are complex and difficult to achieve; I found it hard to pick one thing. So I asked for more Trans visibility in TfL. But how? So I thought about it, and asked if we could fly the Trans flag during Trans Awareness Week. Mark said yes. I had half expected a no.
So now my journey has been from being the closeted Trans woman too scared to be herself at work to being the woman who persuaded the Mark Wild to fly the Trans flag at 55 Broadway.
I hope that this will be a milestone for Trans visibility in our community, and for TfL too; I hope TfL will be recognised as one of the organisations leading the way on Trans inclusion. For me it’s a long held ambition come true and I’m incredibly proud!